Have you ever heard of an equilibrium? If not, it is a state of balance. I learned about chemical equilibrium during my 11th-grade chemistry class. I was taught that an equilibrium is dynamic as the rate of forward and backward reactions eventually become equal.
This balance allows a chemical reaction to continue. Similarly, when the rate of progress corresponds to life’s backward pull, an equilibrium is attained. Intriguing right?
This phenomenon showcases an intricate pattern of highs and lows that counterbalances our lives.
Conflicting emotions
Woven from the yarns of contradiction and anticipation, our minds succumb to illusion. The conflicting perception apprises us if we are doing too much or not enough. Constantly questioning whether you’ve been too outspoken, crossed a line, made others uneasy, or if you should’ve done better is exhausting.
But do you realise that in the process of being better, you are unintentionally blocking yourself out? You are not only striving to be someone else but burying your entire being. As an 18-year-old, I find myself in the whirlwind of conflicting emotions.
At times, I have already mapped out my future. Yet, I feel this turmoil inside my head that fails to decipher the path I wish to tread. And that questions my entire being. But I am just 18. I have not even lived half of my life. Am I allowed to feel this way? Yes.
It is okay to wrestle with moments of crisis and drown in the abyss of obscurity. Why? Because our psyche is a labyrinth of enigma. I am often overwhelmed when I think about the things that never came to pass. Yet, is not it a blessing that I was spared from having something that ultimately was not meant for me?
I used to tear myself up when things did not go my way. When I felt like expressing myself, I would silence my voice so downright that even my screams seemed muffled. I would self-isolate. Create emotional barriers. The deeply ingrained people-pleaser mindset had deterred me from being myself. I had lost the sight of my being. It took considerable time to realise the harm I was inflicting upon myself. And when I did, I drew a line. Props to everyone who had my back, but peace? That was my solo gig, no doubt about that. I felt okay when I was ready to feel so.
Nurturing resilience
You can be outspoken, loud, carefree, and sometimes difficult to deal with, but those qualities make you who you are. You do not have to fit into every mould, to avoid feeling excluded. It is crucial to refrain from letting your doubts overshadow your authenticity. When circumstances diverge from expectations, nurture your resilience. Remember, our imperfections are pivotal in shaping our character for the better.
You can be outspoken, loud, carefree, and sometimes difficult to deal with, but those qualities make you who you are. You do not have to fit into every mould, to avoid feeling excluded. It is crucial to refrain from letting your doubts overshadow your authenticity. When circumstances diverge from expectations, nurture your resilience. Remember, our imperfections are pivotal in shaping our character for the better.
Equilibrium is a catalyst that unknowingly fuels us relentlessly to reach a point where every experience falls into place. The sheer joy erases past sorrows, yet within lies a core of gratitude for persevering. The perpetual despair is nonetheless a footnote that guides us to our highest potential.
Attaining an equilibrium can be exhausting, whether dealing with the chemicals or trying to get through the day. Struggle and progress?
They are like those pesky tag team partners, always hogging the limelight. So whenever you feel stuck in a never-ending sphere, remind yourself that these are wake-up calls demanding you to step up in the game and accept the realities that extend beyond the boundary of the macrocosm—you being bigger than the whole sky.
