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How domestic violence is claiming Nepali women’s lives: Here’s a case in point

Pinky Kurmi who died due to continuous domestic violence in Bara
Pinky Kurmi who died due to continuous domestic violence in Bara

Letting his sister Pinky marry Dipendra Kurmi of Motibhagh, Kalaiya sub-metropolitan city of Bara, Manish Prasad Kurmi thought her conjugal life would be full of happiness as she was marrying a banker, the only son of the family.

Pinky’s wedding took place in 2010 and her parents sent her with a dowry of Rs 4 million in cash and 10 tolas (around 116 grams) of gold.

But, Pinky was never happy. She constantly suffered from domestic violence in her in-law’s house and died at the age of 32. She died at Mediciti Hospital, Nakkhu, Lalitpur on September 18. Her parental family claims it was a murder case.

Pinky’s brother, Manish, has lodged a complaint at the District Police Office, Bara, demanding an investigation.

Unexpected unfoldings  

Pinky’s husband Dipendra (36), the manager of a branch of the Nepal SBI Bank in Birgunj, father-in-law Murari Prasad Jaiswar (Kurmi), mother-in-law Mathura Devi and uncle-in-law Jagat Prasad Jaiswar have been accused of murder. Police have arrested Dipendra and started an investigation.

The family claims that Dipendra pressured her to bring some more cash as her family was in the construction business. When she refused, Pinky was beaten up.

It is mentioned in the complaint that Pinky’s head, chest and limbs were injured when they kicked, punched and hit her with sticks on the evening of September 3.

The next day, her in-laws took her to Dr Udaya Narayan Singh’s clinic in Birgunj for treatment. Pinky’s nose and ears were bleeding and she was vomiting. Her parents’ side alleges that despite the doctor’s advice to undergo a CT scan, the husband’s family ignored it and kept her at home.

After Pinky’s condition became serious, she was taken to the Advanced Hospital in Birgunj on September 12. The next day, she was taken to Bharatpur in Chitwan for further treatment, but after Chitwan Medical College referred her to Kathmandu, she was admitted to Mediciti Hospital.

She died on September 18 during treatment, and a postmortem was conducted on September 19 at Patan Institute of Health Sciences, Lagankhel.

Constant domestic violence

According to Pinky’s sister Sapana, Dipendra got promoted in the bank the same year he got married. Then, he started pressurising his wife to ask her parents to give him a car as a dowry. When Pinky refused to ask, saying that her parents were not in a position to give her a car, she was banned from visiting them. He also restricted her from using her phone.

Manish and Sapana, siblings of Pinky, claim their sister was subjected to constant domestic violence.
Manish and Sapana, siblings of Pinky, claim their sister was subjected to constant domestic violence.

According to her brother Manish, Pinky was beaten badly by her husband when she was pregnant. “After finding out that my sister was pregnant, I went to Janakpur and rescued her and brought her to Chitwan. My niece was born in Narayanghat,” he says.

On the one hand, the demand for a car as a dowry, on the other hand, the domestic violence on the pretext of giving birth to a daughter… Pinky even attempted suicide once, but neighbours found out early and rescued her immediately.

“After calling the community many times and discussing it, we made an agreement that from then on, they would not inflict any form of domestic violence, but their behaviour never changed.” Manish tells Onlinekhabar. “She never breathed a sigh of happiness.”

On November 4, 2017, Pinky went to court to indict her husband for domestic violence but withdrew for the sake of her children after her husband apologised and cried in front of her.

However, even after that, her husband’s abuse did not stop.

Saraswati Khanal, a women’s rights activist from Kalaiya, also her neighbour, says that Pinky was constantly tortured by family members. “Since she got married, Pinky was subjected to domestic violence. I was threatened whenever I spoke for her.”

Smelling a rat

Pinky’s body was taken to Patan Hospital for postmortem after she died due to injuries on her body. In the process, Dipendra had a dispute with the doctor involved in the postmortem of Pinky’s body, whose audio conversation gives strength to a domestic violence charge against him.

In the audio conversation that was made public, the female doctor said that there was a difference between the bruises seen on the body and the head and that there was a blood clot in the head. “The colours of the bruises seen on the head and neck are different (green and purple, respectively). The bruises seen on her body are new. She has two injuries on her head. There is SDH (sub-dural haemorrhage) in both breasts. My report is not the only proof, the police will investigate,” she said.

But, Dipendra’s supporters have questioned neurosurgeon Dr Gopal Raman Sharma’s diagnosis of bleeding due to a lack of platelets and told him to conduct a postmortem with another doctor.

Pinky’s husband Dipendra also says that Pinky was taken to the hospital after the bleeding from her gums did not stop.

On September 3, when he went to the dentist, the dentist said that there was no problem with the gums, so he took her to the physician the next day. He says that he did not know about the head injury, saying that the platelets were found to be 50,000 during the blood test, and she was treated according to the doctor’s advice.

“My wife passed away and my image is being tarnished with the false accusation of domestic violence,” he says. In the audio conversation that was made public, he says to the concerned doctor at the postmortem, “My life is over with your report; my life is in your hand; do whatever you have to do.”

Meanwhile, SP Hobindra Bogti of the Bara District Police Office says, “We are investigating it very sensitively.”


This story was translated from the original Nepali version and edited for clarity and length.

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Bidari is an Onlinekhabar correspondent based in Birgunj of southern Nepal.

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