Sindhupalchok, September 4
At an age when she should be holding her father’s hand on her way to school, 11-year-old Khusbu Karki of Bahrabise Municipality-3, Sindhupalchok, has been forced to perform the funeral rites for him.
Khusbu began observing the Hindu mourning rituals after her father, Padam Karki, went missing in the devastating flood in the Bhotekoshi River in Rasuwa.
The family’s elder daughter, 14-year-old Khushi Karki, was unable to perform the rites due to health problems, so her younger sister Khusbu stepped forward to undertake the rituals herself.
Khusbu, a sixth-grade student at Melamchi Ghyang in Helambu Rural Municipality, has been sitting in the mourning enclosure, crying as she remembers her father.
She is young, but the weight of her memories and grief is immense. Even as she observes the mourning rituals, a small hope remains alive in her heart that perhaps her father will return someday. “Although I am his daughter, I am performing the rites according to our social tradition because my father is missing,” she said emotionally. “It is my duty to complete the 13-day mourning rituals. I gathered the courage to do this because I believe that completing the rituals will help my father attain salvation. Even though I do not have a brother, I felt I had to fulfil my responsibility in mourning my father.”
Khusbu said that embracing the tradition and undertaking the rituals as her heart told her to has not been easy. “I am at an age when I should be carrying my schoolbooks and going to school. But after being burdened with this responsibility, I decided to complete it,” she said. “While sitting in mourning, I sometimes feel that my father might suddenly come home.”
Hoping that her father will return, she continues to look toward the road while sitting in the mourning enclosure. Having to perform the funeral rites without even finding her father’s body has left Khusbu both deeply distressed and confused. With no certainty about whether he is alive or dead, other family members are also in deep grief. Nevertheless, she chose to observe the mourning rituals herself, driven by the belief that she must fulfil her duty to her father according to Hindu tradition.
Padam was the family’s main breadwinner
Padam was the family’s primary source of income. He had been working as a van driver for nearly two decades. For the Karki family, which had modest financial means, his driving job was the main source of income for household expenses and the upbringing of his two daughters.
To his two daughters, Padam was more than just a father. He was the family’s main source of support and the foundation of their future. He had spent years behind the wheel, carrying the responsibility of educating his daughters, meeting household expenses and securing the family’s future.
The journey he undertook to provide for his family has now become the most painful journey of their lives. Padam went missing after the devastating flood on Bhadra 10 while he was transporting goods from Rasuwa to Kathmandu. For the family waiting for Padam to return home, each passing day has become increasingly difficult. Khusbu does not know what happened to her father, and his body has not been found. At her age, the absence of her father means far more to her than the meaning of performing funeral rites.
A daughter fulfils her duty
The decision to have Khusbu perform the mourning rituals even though her father’s death has not been confirmed was not an easy one for the family. But she says she is prepared to fulfil her duty to her father. Only 11 years old, Khusbu’s decision to perform the rituals in memory of her father has become an emotional moment for the entire family.
The floods have left many families without their loved ones. In many households, searches for missing relatives are still underway. Many families continue to wait day and night, hoping their loved ones will return. Khusbu has become a representative story of that grief.
Her father drove for years to provide for his family. He struggled to secure a better future for his daughters and put his own wishes aside for the sake of his family’s happiness. But Padam, who was once the family’s main support, has now become a memory and someone they can only wait for. Sitting in mourning, Khusbu keeps saying just one thing: “Father, please come back. I am waiting for you.”
